Friday, May 10, 2013

EDIM: Embarass, Schmembarass

EVERY DAY IN MAY, DAY 10: Most embarrassing moment(s).

So far, out of all the blog challenge prompts, this one is, by far, the hardest for me. Nothing horrifyingly embarrassing has ever happened to me. Sure, I've tucked my skirt into my pantyhose (as a child and as a grown-ass woman) and I've even wet the bed whilst occupied by a lover (reads lovvvv-ahhhhh), but yet I don't really find those things embarrassing. I've been racking my brain for days and still haven't come up with anything. However, I have daily "mind movies" (my form of daydreams) about all the horrifically embarrassing things that could  happen to me. So, here is a list of my most recent:
  • This morning, while walking in the thunder and lightening with my umbrella, I imagined being struck by lightening and pooping my pants.
  • Yesterday, while going to the bathroom, I imagined peeing down the side of my leg and soaking my pant leg before returning to work.
  • Earlier this week, while grocery shopping, I imagined accidentally dropping a carton of milk and gracelessly slipping along the dairy isle ala this gallon smashing video. My "mind movie" embarrassment didn't stop there, because I imagined HEB pressing charges thinking that I was pranking them instead of just being clumsy.

  •  I don't even want to go into all the dreadfully embarrassing things that I've imagined happening on my wedding day, but let's just say that most of them start with getting arrested for indecent exposure!

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