Thursday, April 17, 2014

Rejection, Part II: Ex History

In my second post on rejection, I'd like to write about some rejections I've personally doled out. Today, children, you will be learning about my ex history.

I'm a very lucky girl with a wonderful husband, but I certainly have been unlucky with love in the past. Recently, a few individuals from my romantic history have made it into my general internet news feeds and I thought it would be interesting to discuss some data points regarding those old relationships.

NAME: Professor Dumpster, although I knew him as Dr. Jeff
TIME: 2010-ish, for a couple months
BIO: Environmental science Professor, divorcé, father
DETAILS: Dr. Jeff was one of my first "successful" OKCupid experiences. We went on a couple of dates and I had a decent time. He would take his shoes off at bars, which didn't bother me so much as I, too, like being barefoot. (I'm barefoot right now!) The distinction here is that I would take my shoes off in a bar while sitting down. He, however, took his shoes off and walked around the bar, played pool, ordered a drink, etc. all while barefoot.
REJECTION REASON: The deal breaker for me was when he said he had a daughter that lived in Brazil and that he was happy he didn't have to deal with the normal aspects of being a father, like bed-wetting, sadness, or sickness. I definitely needed someone in my life who could handle all three of those things.
REJECTION METHOD: I just stop answering his texts, emails, phone calls, etc.

NAME: Barrett Brown
TIME: 2007-ish, various make-out sessions
BIO: Journalist, federal prisoner, friend of a friend
DETAILS: Barrett was the best friend of someone who could only be described as an ex-boyfriend, although I don't think we "technically dated." I frequently found myself angrily flirting with Barrett (you know how young girls are) and several times we would make out and then be mean to each other. One particular time, he invited me back to his hotel room. Instead of going in, we made out in my car and I left.
REJECTION REASON: He doesn't brush his teeth and I was trying to be respectful to the guy I was "dating."
REJECTION METHOD: Driving away slowly.

NAME: "Big Tex"
TIME: 2008-ish, for several months
BIO: Artist, cowboy, schizophrenic
DETAILS: I truly enjoyed this relationship. There's not much better for a wild girl in her early twenties than a cute and crazy cowboy who treats her the way a purdy lady should be treated. We drank, we danced, and he visited me nearly every weekend in Austin for fun-tastic events.
REJECTION REASON: He asked me for a hammer and said he wanted to wear my skin over his skeleton during what could only be described as a schizophrenic, drunken episode.
REJECTION METHOD: Kicking him out of my house during a scheduled visit. Having said that, we gave it another go several more times after this incident, but things kept getting crazier and crazier.

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Rejection, Part I: Rejection Letters

After waiting for several months to see if my wait-listed graduate school status would turn into an acceptance, I have finally received my rejection notice from UT.

Rejection letters are no longer sent. Instead, I got an email telling me to log in and check online.

While I'm truly disappointed, I'm ultimately placing this rejection on the scale somewhere between "kind of sucks" and "no big deal." Please, don't interpret that to mean that I didn't really care about getting into grad school. Rather, nothing in my life changes, I am still pleased as a plum, and I will just try again next year. More importantly, I'm not entirely sure it was the right time for me, as I still have two jobs and recently resigned my post with the Wendy Davis group due to the time commitment. So, in summary, I won't be going to grad school this fall and that kind of bums me out. And with that in mind, this is the first post of a two-parter on rejection:

I recently saw this post online of rejections letters sent to famous people. I find this pretty motivating.

Slyvia Plath Rejection Letter

 Stay tuned for tomorrow's rejection related post!

Wednesday, April 9, 2014

My Rap Debut

Happy Wednesday, y'all. Today is a very special day for LD because tonight is my rap debut. Yes, you read that right, I will be rapping for the first time tonight at Trailer Space with The Abominable Mex, or Mex as we know him.

Several months ago, Mex asked me to rap with his ever-growing group and, while I was excited about the idea, I didn't think I'd have the courage to go through with it. We set a date, I started writing rhymes, and tonight I get up on stage to make a mild fool of myself in front of friends. It all sounds wonderful! I have 16 bars in Mex's "Trailer Space Anthem" and, naturally, was inspired by Salt N' Pepa so my lyrics are a wee bit explicit. At this point, I'm as ready as I'll ever be, but I'd be more confident if we had actually practiced beforehand.

Earlier this week I spent most of my free time focusing on wardrobe. After lots of help from my lady friends, I decided to go for a hip hop Jane Fonda look:

Get it, gurl!

I was able to find everything I needed online, with the exception of the tights which are already a wardrobe staple for me. I was also going to cover up with my favorite black-market Dallas Mavericks Starter jacket in a kid's size large for the adorable hip hop look, which I figure is the only hip hop look I can pull off.

Fly kicks courtesy of DSW:,dsw12cat460004

Sexy Maidenform "leotard" with a suspenders look to highlight my nerdy lifestyle. Added bonus for the tummy-tucking, shapewear. I figured a black bra or striped tube top would cover my girls well enough:

Gina had some excellent wardrobe suggestions and mentioned a bodysuit immediately. However, after looking into it furher, I realized she was talking about something more like this:

While green Hawiaan print isn't really my "thing", I could see myself wearing something along these lines:

After all my window shopping for an outfit, I decided I would be even more nervous looking like a fool while performing, than I would if I was just in my normal clothes. So, hip hop Jane Fonda will just have to wait for a more appropriate time, like Halloween or my second rap performance.

If you want to come see me tonight, we go on at 8pm. Wish me luck!

Sunday, April 6, 2014

Thursday, April 3, 2014

Thursday Tidbits

Yay, it's April. I feel like I've been counting down the days until April these past few weeks, but I can't necessarily tell you why. Spring is here and I'm ready to get sprung. Here are some tidbits:
  • I got my nails did yesterday, y'all! I went to Paloma for one of Nails Y'all's aweschumb manicures. It was an "artist's choice" special, which removed any pressure from me to come up with a nail idea. Meghann does intricate designs and decals in both vegan polish and my favorite, shellac/gel polish. In preparation, she asked me not to peel off my current gel manicure, which is one of my OCD passions, so I honored her request and brought my rainbow jar of "nail skins" with me. I love peeling off old gel manicures.
My nail skins in a jar, while my shellac is being removed properly.

Fly nails
  • First, let me preface by saying that I don't like Steely Dan. I just don't; no explanation necessary. However, this is one of my favorite songs ever! We just watched American Hustle and the film started out with this song. Amy Adams has never looked so sexy and now I'm dreaming of Diane von Furstenberg wrap dresses.

  • The only person who pranked me at the office on April Fools Day was myself. I accidentally filled my water bottle too full and spilled at least half a cup of water into my crotch when I took a sip. Meh, I've done clumsier things and fortunately, I store a pair of "emergency panties" in my desk just for this reason. I toweled off my dress, broke out the emergency pair, and finished the day without any more glitches.

  • I'm going to be a rap chick, y'all. Karen and I had a "rap group" in high school called Latino Pride. My name was 2Pāl (i.e. too pale) and we basically made up rhymes in broken Spanglish. A while back my rap friend, Mex, asked me to be a fly girl in his group Mex Mode. While I'm pretty great at joking around and making clever rhymes, I've never considered writing and performing. I have my first performance April 9th at Mex's birthday party and I'm surprisingly calm about it. Bottom line: I will either embarrass myself in front of friends or do pretty great and be able to scratch that one off my bucket list. Wish my luck!
  • Tomorrow is our 6 Month-iversary!! I'm still, as expected, wildly excited to be married to BBC. Never in my life did I think I would be so content with myself and wonderfully happy with another person the way I am with Brandon. I can only hope we're just as happy on our 60th anniversary. We'll be celebrating, simply because I want to celebrate all these small anniversaries because once they past we will only have our annual anniversary. I feel so fortunate to have this happiness that celebration just seems natural. We'll being going to Uchi and I got Devo tickets for my sweetie.

Tuesday, March 18, 2014

South By South Best

Perhaps I'm getting dull and boring, or perhaps the festival just feels like it's getting out of hand, but this year I wasn't really feeling SXSW. Either way, this year turned out to my most favorite SXSW. Here are my happy reflections from my SXSBest.

The best thing this year, by far, was taking the entire week off of work without any intention of joining in the festivities. My staycation certainly turned into a SXSW party, but my expectations were low and I knew I would be happy at home if the party didn't appeal to me. I also had plenty of down time to tackle some house chores, hang out with Pam and baby Charlie, and nap!

My week started off with a bang! Egyptian Lover is a DJ from the early 1980s that BBC turned me on to. Brandon was in a breakdancing crew as a kid, with Egyptian Lover being one of his favorite beat throwers. We were both pretty excited to learn that he was DJing at Holy Mountain and quickly made plans to be front and center at the stage. It was an amazing show and we danced our boo-tays off. Last year for BBC's birthday I bought him an unopened, original pressing Egyptian Lover album. We brought it, opened in it front of da Lovah, and got it signed.

I had to pee, so the album came with me.

Monday was a very exciting day for me. I woke up early-ish (for being on vacation) and went down to Austin Pets Alive! to meet my favorite internet sensation, Lil Bub. It's pretty insane how long the line was to meet this petite puss, but it was worth the 45 minutes and the $25 donation. The event raised $7,000 and I got to say, "Howdy, lady!" to a kitty celebrity. It was the only time I've ever been star struck by a celebrity. (Or, should I say, celebr-kitty!)

This photo is a keeper!!

Here are some photo out-takes. After all, we both can't look great all the time.

Lil Bub showing me her Yoda impression!

I wonder how well Grumpy Cat is taken care of with all the events she does over SXSW, including a Town Lake boat ride. You can rest assured that Lil Bub is pampered like a princess and got plenty of breaks and alone time with her pops during the event. I snapped a pic of a little snuggle break and for reference: Lil Bub's Dude is Hot and We Need to Talk About it.

Since I had the day off, I took the opportunity to cook a 14 pound turkey Monday and host a Fakes-giving movie night with the ladies. We had a feast with all the trimmings: stuffing, cranberries, mashed potatoes, fancy potatoes á la Bridget, sweet potatoes, green bean casserole, pie, bisquits, brownies, and cranberry jammy cocktails. We watched Son in Law, being that it's a Thanksgiving movie and all, and since it was Spring Break we didn't let the party stop once the film did.

Wednesday afternoon BBC and I set sail on a Bruise Cruise on Town Lake. It was a beautiful day and the music was great: Arp, Kelley Stoltz, and Coachwhips. My favorite part was watching the sun set while we cruised to the Coachwhips. I've been on a boat before, but I was really surprised with the weak sea legs I have. It was dizzying walking around while we were sailing and I felt like I was floating on air even after the cruise ended.

Watching the sun set on a boat, y'all!

Glamorous Sherry!

We started many of our days and ended most of our nights a Trailer Space, which was a pretty great buffer from the SXSW world. Brandon played a show Saturday night and we were fortunate enough to find great parking everywhere we went. Obnox, Gary Numan, Parquet Courts, Ty Segall, The Blind Shake, Reigning Sound, and all of our favorite local bands filled out the rest of the weekend. I think my favorite surprise was seeing Harvey Sid Fisher play an unexpected show at Trailer Space. 

Harvey Sid Fisher and BBC

As always, we ended our SXSW at the best party in town, Uncle Doug's Chili Dog Fest. Eating chili dogs and drinking beer is the best way to cure a week-long hangover. We crawled out of bed Sunday afternoon to join our favorite, tired locals for great rock n' roll. And, even better, it raised money for Austin Pets Alive! and HAAM. Needless to say, yesterday was a pretty tough day back in the office.

Pretty perky for the Sunday after SXSW. I woke up like dis!

The were certainly ups and downs at SXSW this year. The insanity of Wednesday night outside of Mohawk was sobering, to say the least. Every single person involved could have been someone we knew or loved. Friday night, after an amazing and packed Reigning Sound show at Yellow Jacket, a team of under-age, skateboarding jackasses started swinging their boards at bar staff breaking noses and busting faces when they were denied entry. I heard countless other stories of assholes across town causing havoc. It's all so very disappointing, I truly feel like the festival has gotten out of control, and I hope things will be better regulated next year.

So why was this the SXSBest ever? This year Brandon wasn't working at a bar or the festival, so we got to enjoy the entire week together. Whether we were napping in the back of our car mid-day, missing all but one song of a set that we really wanted to catch, or losing our hearing at the loudest Blind Shake show ever, it was great experiencing everything with my best friend.

Friday, March 7, 2014

5 Facts Friday

Here are 5 random facts/stories about yours truly.

  • My Sophomore year in high school I wore gold eyeshadow as blush. My BFF, Karen, told me that you were supposed to wear blush in a tone similar to your natural blushing color. I agreed with her stating that that was what I did. She quickly shot me down telling me that nobody blushed gold. I'd still like to think that I could blush in golden hues if I was charmed enough.
  • Jay-Z is fixing my sweetie's grill. Well, not really, but kind of? The Grammy Organization, MusicCares, offers grants to musicians and we got one for BBC's dental overhaul. Woo Hoo
  • I like to use things until they run out. Like pens/markers/highlighters for example. I use the same pen at work until it's empty. Also, there are four rolls of toilet paper in every stall in the bathroom on my floor. Each day I only use the smallest roll in hopes of using it all.
  • I'm absolutely in love with this song right now.
  • I found a crumbly, dirty ten dollar bill on my way to the bus stop this morning!